I worry, I weigh three times my body
I worry, I throw my fear around
But this morning, there’s a calm I can’t explain
The rock candy’s melted, only diamonds now remain

~John Mayer, “Clarity”

I made it to week two!  *Whew*  I talked last week about my difficulties with the cleanse, including battling some massive anxiety.   Little did I know what lay on the other side: perfect, wholesome, filling clarity. 

This weekend was sunny and bright and long.  So maybe that has something to do with it.  But as my Inner Pilot Light reminded me this morning, I 100% deserve to experience ease, joy, love, passion, excitement, beauty, peace, even bliss.  So I lived in it, marinated it, and felt grateful for it.

I feel beyond light and clearheaded with none of last week’s brain fog or confusion. That is not to say I’m no longer struggling with anything, but rather that my mental state is calmer, more relaxed, and more free.  My biggest stumbling blocks are techno detox, feeling hungry, getting to bed on time, eating earlier, and living with a famine perspective (will this be enough?  what if I get hungry?  etc).  But I’m taking the right steps and moving away from sugar, carb, techno, and escapism addictions.

This weekend was certainly difficult.  I made it through my first meal out and my first social affair without drinking or indulging in junk food (full disclosure: one sip of GF beer + a couple extra pita chips).  I probably didn’t stick to the 60-80% alkaline foods guideline but can definitely say that I ate way more veggies than I have in the past.  All-in-all, my victories outweighed my falls.  And through it all I continued to feel light and clear and free.

I’m more content than I’ve been in a long time.  Yes…contented.  That’s the right word.

*Sigh*

Yoga/beauty/life,

Kait xo

Today I’d like to introduce you to Dr. Sara Gottfried, “the Harvard trained integrated physician who helps women, regardless of age, feel vital again using natural hormone balancing.”  <–Her intro on tele-seminars!

As I wrote about on Friday, one of the reasons I love the CSD Cleanse is because it is about more than just our bodies.  Since I was actually in Worcester this weekend I committed to taking some time for me.  To breathe/relax/catch-up.  I visited friends, practiced yoga (both days!), clipped and organized coupons, made late night runs to Whole Foods, watched rom coms ,and caught up on some tele-seminars I had been holding on to for some time.  On Saturda while doing my coupons, I listened to Are Your Hormones Holding You Hostage for  the Holidays?  <–Like I said, I’m catching up!

The focus of the call was Metabolism as it was the free intro to her Mission Ignition e-course on the same topic.  Since I know how much you beauties love reading about food…and we all know how much I geek out about anything to do with the human body, I wanted to share some of her gems with you.  I hope these action steps and words of wisdom inspire you.

“The HALT test is an acronym and the idea with each of these letters is it should act as a trigger to ask yourself, ‘Am I Hungry?  Am I Angry?  Am I lonely?  And I Tired?”

“Maybe its not that you want a hot fudge sundae…maybe its that you want your life to be a hot fudge sundae.”

“So its a question for me of what is it you really want? [...] Do you want that chocolate cake?  Or do you want peace and serenity around food?  Do you want a body that’s de-aging, extending your prime, feeling gloriously energetic and vital?”

“So I make a choice based on my vision of myself in my world.  And the idea here is to really live in congruence and alignment and to be faithful to this bigger picture of who you want to be in the world.”

“[...] stress and cortisol is responsible for 95% of the diseases we treat in conventional medicine.  So 95%…it either causes the disease or makes it worse.”

Yoga/beauty/life,

Kait xo

In general I do not support cleanses.  I think they are unsustainable (kind of like diets) and can even be harmful.  That being said, I adore the CSD and the cleanse.  Today I want to talk about what sets it apart and why I love it so much.

The end of week one is almost here!  5 days counts as a week, right?!

This week has been full of ups and downs.  Day 1 was basically a breeze.  Day 2 brought on a morning-long anxiety attack.  Day 3 saw my mood all over the map.  I was up, down, cranky, exhilarated, energized, fatigued, foggy, and a whole lot of other things. I also wanted sugar.  Badly.  Knowing this was around didn’t help much!

Temptation.

At the end of the day, I was singing (loudly…and out loud) and rocking out to Disney tunes (go ahead: reread that and smile) on my walk home from and in the parking lot outside of the yoga studio.  There were far too many witnesses than is good for my ego! <–Wasn’t yesterday’s affirmation about being a trailblazer and unique?  And didn’t Day 3 say something about letting go of the ninnies in my head?  Hmm…Day 4: more of the same + carb-rich indulgences (paella, crackers, far too many raisins) which then led to stomach aches. *boo hiss*

I’ve been hungry all week, not because I feel deprived but because my body is adjusting to this change and I’m still trying to figure out exactly how much food I need to eat (hint: a lot!). I’ve been fatigued, flirted with constipation (a huge increase in fiber will do that…a little supported bridge with my feet on the floor and all was right with the world), sleeping better than ever, albeit not enough, struggling to focus, being insanely productive, etc.  On the emotional & psychological side, I’ve had revelations and breakdowns, moments of oneness with the universe and mental sabotage while trying to meditate.  I’ve broken through walls and even felt strong enough to rebuild some.

My meditation space & sanctuary *oohhhmm*

And that is the very reason I adore CSD and think it is a valuable cleanse: its about so much more than your body.  I absolutely hate that the word “diet” is included in the title because what Kris lays out is truly a lifestyle.  The book educates, providing the reasons why in the world you’d consider giving up dairy, caffeine, sugar, gluten, meat, and alcohol for 21 days or more…like, ya know, forever.  In addition, there are chapters on non-food related topics like meditation and body care.  In short, the CSD is a guide to a new way of living vitally and wholly, not just healthily.  

The same can be said for the cleanse.  There is only one week’s worth of sample menus plus suggestions on Day 1.  After that, its all about the internal work.  Each day has an focus, prayer, affirmation, and tips to successfully move through detox symptoms and cravings.  At first I was wary because I wanted an easy cleanse: just tell me what to do!  Then I realized the beauty of this way: it teaches the individual how to live this lifestyle independently.  There are no training wheels and this isn’t a quick fix.  Instead, the book provides everything you need to know, including recipes and an extensive resources section.  And if you fall off and skin your knee?  Its totally ok…Kris is gentle and encourages, welcomes, and congratulates any change, no matter how big (omnivore –> vegan; meditating an hour daily) or small (coffee –>green juice; working one or one more day per week).

The cleanse essentially is transitioning you into this lifestyle with loving support.  You might need to repeat multiple times to get “there.”  Then again, your “there” and mine might be totally different!  All I know is that without the mental and emotional support from the book (and my other Crazy Sexy Warriors), this struggle would be so much more.  Its not just my body I’m detoxing: its my whole being.
Find me another cleanse that does that, and maybe I’ll support it.

Until then, you can find me rocking my lotus pose, knocking back veggies galore, and strengthening my spirit.

Yoga/beauty/life,

Kait xo

Zoom zoom.

Tip of the Week

Today I want to revisit the topic of making your budget work for you.

My food spending was a bit all over the place this week.  While in VT last weekend, I had the chance to shop at some farm stands and purchase local-produced products.  Some of these were things were on my grocery list while others, though they were not, were simply too good to pass up!  By the time beau and I arrived home on Sunday, we were exhausted!  Napping for too long led to a woozy/drowsy/kinda-seemed-drunk Kait which, in turn, led to the following exchange:

Me: “Hooooooneey!  I dooooonnnn’t waaaaannna go to Wegmans.  I only neeeeeed a few things and can get them alllll at Trader’s…”
Beau: “Ok then don’t go.  Just shop at Trader’s.”
Me: “But it’ll be more expensive.”  *pouty face*
Beau: “Look if you only need a few things from Wegmans don’t go. “

So that’s what I did.  Did I pay more for certain products because I didn’t shop around?  Yes.  Was it worth it for my sanity?  Yes.  Did I still stay on budget?  Well, you’ll have to keep reading to find out! 

Anyway, back to the tip!  As you’ll see below, only one of my VT purchases is included in my spending.  Huh?  Well, I didn’t include the items purchased off my grocery list because beau paid for them in exchange for me covering our accommodations for the weekend.  <–Teheh I’m one smart cookie budgeting genius!  I also did not include the splurge items I bought because they were my souvenirs from the trip and therefore money for those came out of my discretionary fund.  The only other money I spent on the trip was to cover our accommodations.  Snowshoeing was free.  So was sitting around the house, eating, drinking, and playing Catchphrase.  When I travel I either buy locally-produced food or jewelry.  My splurge foods are someone else’s trinkets.  Same concept, different manifestation.

I operate on the same philosophy when dining out (which I don’t do that often): its an activity, not a necessity, so the money for it comes out of the fun fund!  Eating out is one of the few activities I actually spend $ on since I’m not a big shopper (besides grocery shopping, of course) so if my weekened plans are waffles at WooDaddy + dinner at The Citizen, there’s no way I’m not cutting into my grocery budget!

At the end of the day, this system works for me.  You have to do what’s best for you, so long as its honest and within your means!

Weekly Menu

*Rather than planning specific meals for specific days, I cook in bulk once or twice a week and eat leftovers for both lunch and dinner.  I also eat gleefully devour a green smoothie every morning for breakfast.
*Test recipes for the third Happy Herbivore cookbook are denoted with a * and can include neither a name nor a detailed description.

Leftover Vodka* sauce with penne, chickpeas, and red chard

Mexican dish* similar to a tofu scramble

African plate*

Various reincarnations of this salad (arugula/carrot/avo/onion/black beans/lime juice)

African plate* with quinoa (cooked in broth…OMG I’ll never go back to water!)

• Parsnip and Toasted Walnut Soup  <–finally made it…so friggin delish and easy and comforting!  This is highly recommended.
• Mashed potato dish*
• Paella*

Last but not least…my new fave green smoothie

I use 1Tbs flax, ~1 romaine heart, ~1/2 c peas, 1/2 frozen banana, 1 c milk + water as necessary.
This smoothie is goitrogen-free for those with hypothyroidism.

Spending Savings

*My budget is $40/wk for groceries, household, and H&BC items, with the latter two categories ideally only costing $10 combined.

Trader’s: $27.83
IGA: $3.49

Total: $32.32
Within budget?

ALRIGHT!  Truth be told, I would have made it even with the handful of other products I bought…all together they cost less than $10.  Thank the Universe for year-round farm stands!

Steals and Deals

Trader Joes’s

*These are everyday prices from the Shrewsbury, MA store.

Red Veined Spinach (5oz): $2.89
Organic Romaine Hearts (3 pack): $2.79
Organic Arugula (7 oz) $2.69
Bananas: $0.19/piece
Golden Raisins (1lb): $2.69
Rainbow Peppercorns Grinder: $1.99
Fancy Oyster Crackers: $1.99
Corn Tortillas: $1.49
Nature’s Path Heritage Flakes: $1.99 after $1.00 cpn (from company)

Company of the Week

I had a wonderful company I was going to profile but alas…it as past 11 on  Wednesday and I am officially beat!  Between detox symptoms from the cleanse (mostly mental) and inconsistent sleep patterns, bed > Rapunzel for now.  I promise it’ll be worth the wait!

Yoga/beauty/budgeting,

Kait xo

Don’t forget to check my fabulous company on Project: Food Budget!

Pumpkin Kale Green Monstah - greenmonstermovement.com

If you’ve been following my blog for any time now, you know my love for green smoothies.  I was terrified of the electric green mixtures at first, but after my initial sip, I was hooked…not only on the taste (refreshing and somewhat sweet depending on what you add) but also on the way they made me feel: energized, vital.  No caffeine needed.

Everything I knew about green smoothies, both from doing my own research and from personal experience, indicated they are healthy.  So I kept right on making them, usually 32+ oz a pop!  Then the wonderful Lindsay wrote a post about why she decided to stop drinking green smoothies and their counterparts, green juices.  The post has since been taken down due to the overwhelming response and disrespect but I’ve summarized her points below.

According to Drs. Esselstyn (author, Prevent and Reverse Heart Disease) and Campbell (author, The China Study), Lindsay’s very intelligent and influential mentors (whose expertise I highly value), our food needs to be chewed in order for its’ nutrients to be properly absorbed.  The problem with making smoothies is that the blades of the blender tear up the leaves in a way that ruptures cell walls and changes the way our body responds.  As for juices, the process removes all of the fiber and is therefore equivalent to drinking sugar straight.

You can imagine what the comment section looked like!  I fell into the, “Are you effing kidding me?!” category, but wanted to examine that feeling a little more before contacting Lindsay (privately in a respectful manner since we’re friends).  I soon realized that my anger was really just a defense mechanism against a way of life I had come to know and love (and believe to be healthy) being attacked.  So I jumped into scientist mode and thought it through some more, leading me to the conclusion that this argument doesn’t really make sense based on the way our bodies digest foods.  Let me explain further (emphasis added):

“Mechanical digestion happens in the mouth with the help of the saliva, teeth and tongue. It is the actual break down of food into smaller bits. This makes food easier to digest.  [...] After the food has been processed in the mouth, it is being swallowed. It passes the esophagus and goes all the way down to the stomach. In the stomach, the churning and grinding of the masticated food continues and this is still part of the mechanical digestion of the food we eat.”

As mechanical digestion occurs, “the chemical content of the food is extracted during the process.  This is largely carried out [...] by digestive enzymes which are enzymes that break down polymeric macromolecules into their smaller parts, so that they can be absorbed by the body.”  Source

Chemical digestion occurs primarily in the intestines, where the chyme (the broken down food from mechanical digestion + the gastric juice it mixed with in the stomach) interacts with a ton of enzymes that break the food’s macromolecules (e.g. proteins) into their smaller parts (e.g. amino acids) so that they can then be absorbed through the walls of the intestines and into the body.  The only chemical digestion that occurs in the mouth has to do with breaking down starches (carbs).

Since the primary role of our mouth is mechanical digestion, why should it matter whether I chew my food or the blender/juicer does?  The food will still  interacting with the enzymes in the mouth.  Furthermore, wouldn’t soups made in the blender and other similar fare have the same fate?  In this case, I’m going to respectfully say I disagree.

Next!

Let’s talk about this fiber thing.   The point of juicing (according to proponents) is to remove the fiber from foods so their nutrients can be absorbed  by the body more quickly.  In short, the same argument used to support juicing is also used against it.  Juicing essentially allows you to get more vital nutrients than would be possible through eating (it takes ~1lb of produce to make 1 c of juice) and doesn’t tax your digestive tract.  The Drs don’t disagree with this, as is evident once we look at the sugar bomb comments.  According to the Drs, one of the reasons smoothies/juices are bad for you is because the sugar hits your system more quickly.  In other words, nutrients are getting absorbed faster.   Yup, same argument, different point of view. 

Whether a smoothie/juice is a sugar bomb, however, is totally dependent on what you are putting into it.  If it is chock full of fruit then I totally agree with the Drs and would advise you to avoid it!  If you have a choice between fruit juice and fruit, go with the fruit 100% of the time!  With fruit, you absolutely want the fiber because it slows the body’s reaction (read: insulin release aka uptake of carbs based on how much sugar is in your bloodstream) to the natural sugars in it .  I am by no means saying fruit is bad, just that it is 100% of the time better eaten whole.  What about fruit smoothies?  I’d still say go with the piece of fruit.  Digestion has already begun by the time the smoothie enters your stomach, allowing the sugar to enter your system more quickly and at higher concentrations.  Normally, nutrients enter your system slowly but surely (because mechanical digestion is a staggered process, with food moving from one part of the digestive tract to the other in carefully controlled stages) but if the digestion began outside of your body, then say hellllloooo to your sugar high!

As a side note, the idea of not using a ton of fruit is supported by many proponents of juicing/blending, including the faboosh Kris Carr who recommends a 3:1  veggie-to-fruit ratio.  <–Did I really just use faboosh?  That is what I get for writing while tired!  Just go with it. 

Anyone else feel like we’re running in circles?!

So that leaves us with veg-based juices and smoothies.  To this I say: drink up! 

If the reason smoothies & juices can be so harmful is because the nutrients are absorbed more quickly, then that very reason will lead to positive effects on our bodies so long as the nutrients we’re absorbing include little-to-no sugar.  Don’t let your smoothies be sugar OR calorie bombs.  Instead load them with greens, other veggies (*starchy veggies such as carrots and beets should be treated as fruit), and more greens!  Let other foods such as fruits (preferably as low-GI as you can get), nut butters, protein powders, oils, and seeds (e.g. flax & chia) play minor supporting roles.

I hope I didn’t lose anyone with this long description! I had been contemplating this post but when the e-mails and fbook messages kept rolling in, I knew I needed to address it sooner rather than later.

One final word.  I believe that we have to do what feels right in our bodies.  I plan on exploring that topic more in a future post but to sum things up I truly feel that different bodies have different needs and no one dietary lifestyle fits all.  Shockingly, I do have an idea about what all dietary lifestyles should include more and less of.  Like I said, more on that to come.

Yoga/beauty/greens,

Kait xo

P.S.  If you want to read more about digestion, here are some great user-friendly resources.

• What is Chemical Digestion?  LIVESTRONG
• Mechanical Digestion LIVESTRONG
• See how your digestive system works Mayo Clinic

P.P.S. For the ultimate guide to smoothies/juices and staying in the alkaline range (aka avoiding the sugar bomb), you’ll want this bad boy!

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, dietician, or nutritionist.  This is not medical advice but rather my personal opinions based on research I’ve done, content I’ve been taught, and my personal experiences.  Talk to your doctor before making any changes to your diet or regimen.

Anxiety.

Need solid foods.  says the head not the stomach

Nerves.

Heart racing.

No one said this would be easy.

Affirmation: I love my thighs.  My skin is beautiful.  My organs are healthy and powerful.

Prayer: May I know in my heart that I am precious, worthy, and divine (aka fabulous).  When I act from my own divinity, anything I do is enough.  <–paraphrased

Unfocused.

Cloudy.

Breathe.

One minute, one moment.

I didn’t expect it to be easy.

I didn’t expect it to be this hard.

Day 2.  Things start to breakdown.  The cravings are back.  The bloat is down.

Its a mental game now, all in my head.  My body is well-nourished and so is my soul.  Perhaps this is an upper limit problem.

Its not our weaknesses that scare us the most, right?

What happens if I step into my full potential?

…if I lose those last few pounds?

…if I come into my own and fully be/live/experience/influence/change/shift my world and those in it?

Bring on the fear, the detox symptoms.  

I got this.  Right…?

xo

And so it begins. 

For the next 21 days I’ll be abstaining from the following as part of the 21-day Crazy Sexy Cleanse:

• Meat
• Dairy
• Sugar
• Alcohol

I’m luckily not alone on this journey, having found the Crazy, Sexy 21 Day Warrior Cleansers! group on Fbook before even deciding to do the cleanse.  With their help and support I’ll be focusing on consuming mostly alkaline foods over the course of the next three weeks.  This means I will be eating lots of the following (mostly in their raw form):

• greens
• veggies
• low-GI fruits
• beans
• nuts & seeds
• more greens

For more information on alkaline foods check out this great introduction and Kris’ vlog on the topic.

Working Up to It

This cleanse is something I’ve been working towards over the past couple of weeks.  Adherence to my food budget has been up and down as I adjust to consuming more veggies and less of everything else.  I’m experimenting with new foods, new smoothie combos, and new types of snacks (e.g. a baked sweet potato or celery with almond butter vs almonds and raisins).  I’ve (kind of) started meditating daily and have gotten into the habit of beginning each day with hot water + lemon + cayenne.

Last week was a major slip-up as I went on a huge sugar bender, barely meditated, and was in hibernation mode.  I blame the full moon as shit was hitting the fan in just about every part of my life.  This weekend I reset while in VT, focusing on veggie-licious meals..and enjoying my last two days with sugar + alcohol by eating too much dessert and drinking too much wine…with the people I love.  Yea it was perfect (if not recommended).

Playing by the my rules

Gluten: I have no intention of cutting out gluten completely but do intend on significantly cutting back on my gluten-intake (written as I spoon oyster crackers into my soup).  I do not believe I’m gluten-intolerant but I am curious to see how my body reacts.  As I’ve limited my carb intake (in the form of bread, pasta, crackers, chips, etc) over the past couple of weeks (again, replacing it with veggies), I’ve noticed my body feels better.  Pounds just come off, bloating goes away, and I sleep more soundly.  So I figure it can’t hurt.  Plus I already love GF grains such as oats and quinoa and products like Mary’s crackers.  My meal plan this week is accidentally GF so my goal is to consume no more than 2 servings of gluten each day (e.g. bowl of cereal + slice of bread or sandwich).  I’m hoping to taper this off as the cleanse goes on and see how it goes.

Sugar: I have decided to keep natural sugars from fruit, honey, maple syrup, and evaporated cane juice in my life.  With the exception of last week, my sugar intake is fairly low and is the form of fruit, self-baked goods sweetened with maple syrup or honey, and Nature’s Path granola (10g sugar + 5g fiber/serving). Rather than say sayonara to these, I’ve made traded them for better options.  For example, I bought cereal with a much lower sugar content (Nature’s Path Heritage Flakes: 4 g sugar+5 g fiber/serving) and have begun using only half a banana (vs a whole one) in my morning smoothie.  I’m not limiting my fruit intake but will focus on snacking on veggies instead.  As with gluten, I intend on tapering my sugar intake off as the cleanse goes on.

For a brief overview of the CSD, check out Kris’ Top 15 CSD Tips!

Final Thoughts

I am so excited to embark on this cleanse with the support of all my other C/S Warriors!  There is no way we can fail because each and every change we make is a step in the positive direction.  We might slip up but that is ok as each moment presents us with a brand spankin’ new opportunity to make a better decision.

I am oh-so-excited excited about experimenting with new foods and the raw food lifestyle.  I’ve been hesitant to jump into the world of raw foods because it seemed so big and intimidating.  Having a structured guide to help me on my way is huge for me, as is having a group of people to turn to with questions and concerns!

The greatest part about the cleanse is that it isn’t just about the physical body.  Kris’ guide includes daily prayers (mantras if you will) and affirmations.  As stoked as I am to experiment with new foods, food styles, and flavors, I’m also eager to experience the growth that undoubtedly will come from checking in and living more in the moment.  I have no doubt it’ll be rocky at times but I also am certain that the joyous moments, when I feel completely one with the Universe will outweigh (and more than makeup for) the less-than-ideal times.

I’ll be sharing parts of my journey with you here.  I decided to not set a day or format but just create as is necessary and/or desired.  It might be in the forms of pictures, videos, song lyrics, quotes, personal ramblings, or anything else.  We’ll see what each new day brings.

Thank you for being a part of this new journey on which I’m embarking.  As always, please don’t hesitate to leave questions and encouragement.  I’d love to talk more about the tenets of the CSD and cleanse and help you on your journey if that is what feels authentic and sparkly and magical for you.

Here’s to coming into our full potential and THRIVING.

Yoga, beauty, life,

Kait xo

3…

2…

1!

Tip of the Week

I have a confession to make: I love grocery shopping.   As in, I often get lost inside of a store for hours on end just browsing and exploring.  Grocery stores are like black holes: they suck me in and before I know it two (or more!) hours has past and I didn’t even realize it!  In fact, I often joke that I should start a concierge grocery shopping business!  <–any takers?

This love and the many hours spent shopping have paid off, however, in the form of savings.  More specifically, on more than one occasion, whilst aimlessly wandering the aisles of Wegmans, pondering the best way to spend those last few dollars or which items I need to remove from my cart in order to make budget, I’ve stumbled upon something wonderful: coupons!  Thanks to my pensive ways, I’ve found coupons hidden on tables, end caps, and blended in with the prices!  One time, for example, I found a stack of coupons for free organic frozen veggies.  You can bet I grabbed a handful!  Another time I found a store coupon for an additional $1.50 off the blemish cream I needed and already had a manufacturer’s coupon for!  <–Doesn’t “blemish cream” sound so much fancier than “zit cream”?  Both times, and many others, the coupons were just sitting there, waiting to be used but placed strategically enough that most people, in their hurry and obliviousness, would miss.  It was equal parts sneaky and genius on Wegmans’ behalf.

So my tip this week is to take your time!  Wander around the grocery store and be aware of what’s around you.  Try going at an off time so you aren’t battling crowds…and so you don’t look too crazy while stuffing handfuls of coupons into your bag/binder/accordion file/etc.  Relish in your freedom to shop and in the varieties of goods available to you.  Discover something new, whether its a new treat to love or a hidden deal.

Meal Plan

*Rather than planning specific meals for specific days, I cook in bulk once or twice a week and eat leftovers for both lunch and dinner.  I also eat gleefully devour a green smoothie every morning for breakfast.

*Test recipes for the third Happy Herbivore cookbook are denoted with a * and can include neither a name nor a detailed description.

My photos are undoubtedly lacking this week.  I’m still figuring out this lighting/exposure/ISO thing and the couple of days where I could shoot in natural light happened to be blindingly overcast in the way only New England dreary days can be!

Cinnamon Raisin Oatmeal

Tofu Scramble with kale, orange pepper, & black beans + orange w/ AB

Lentils* + sauteed kale <– I was obsessed and ate this combo for 3 meals!

Veg Sandwich featuring carrots, avo, and spread* (the red stuff closest to the bread).  Also eaten multiple times!

My new go-to snack: microwave-baked sweet potato topped with AB + cinnamon

Pen*s Penne a la vodka* with roasted b’nut squash + peas.  Phone pic.

• Arugula + carrot salad with Balsalmic Dijon Dressing (EHH)
• Mexican dish*
• Parsnip & Toasted Walnut Soup<–another P:FB blogger!
• Chocolate Oat Quinoa (inspired by Chelsey’s recipe)

Spending Savings

*My budget is $40/wk for groceries, household, and H&BC items, with the latter two categories ideally only costing $10 combined.

Wegmans: $18.36
Trader’s: $20.05

Total: $48.41
Within budget? D:<

I’m up and down! I expected to go over this week because I needed some bigger ticket items like vanilla extract (I even went with the cheaper one!) and cinnamon and coconut oil (at a rock bottom price)!  I also got a little carried away buying greens (chard, dinosaur kale, and romaine), more, in fact, than I actually needed (I underestimated how far the dinosaur kale would go)!  I’m travelling this weekend though so its kind of a relief knowing that I have fresh food even if I can’t shop Sunday!  I’m also lowering next week’s budget to $35 since I need a Brita filter.  =/

*A second goal is to save as much as if not more than I spend.  This excludes purchases at Trader Joe’s since coupons are of limited use there.

Eligible Spending: $18.36
Amount Saved: $ 6.98
Savings goal met?

Again, I’m not too upset about this since I did score some awesome deals and bought mostly fresh foods and/or things that I needed but didn’t have coupons for.

Steals and Deals

I hope you like the new layout inspired by Healthy Life Deals!

Wegmans

Alter Eco Organic Pearl Quinoa: $4.99
$1.00 Alter Eco cpn
and $1.00/Nature’s Marketplace purchase of $3.00+ (Wegmans 7 Weeks of Great Savings booklet)
Total price = $2.99

Spectrum Coconut Oil (refined): $6.99
$2.00 Spectrum cpn (no longer available)
and $1.00/Nature’s Marketplace purchase of $3.00+ (Wegmans 7 Weeks of Great Savings booklet)
Total Price $3.99

I also received 2 free boxes of tissues thanks to the 7 Weeks of Great Savings booklet.

Trader Joes’s

*These are everyday prices from the Shrewsbury, MA store.

Toothpaste: $2.20
Avocados (4-pack): $2.99 <–cheaper than $10/10 at S&S
Organic Romaine Hearts (3-pack): $2.79
Organic Onions (2lb): $2.20
Alcohol-Free Pure Vanilla Extract: $3.99
Ground Cinnamon: $1.99 <–my favorite cinnamon!
Bell Peppers: $1.29/piece

That’s it for this week folks!

Yoga/beauty/veggies/life,

Kait xo

Don’t forget to check out the other P:FB bloggers:

Yoga classes have been hard lately.  I’m going through some sort of change and I’ve left classes feeling like shit.  Not energized and light per usual but completely drained and down on myself.  I thought there was something wrong with me until a recent teleseminar I tuned into with Hillary Rubin.  It was geared towards yoga teachers but I listened anyway (what can I say, I adore her and will listen to any content she puts out).  Well…I half-listened, as I do on most teleseminars.  But my ears perked up when she talked about her healing process and how, during times of cosmic shifts, yoga used to leave her feeling…well exactly like I had been lately.  That stuck with me, even though I didn’t know why (yet).

Fast forward to this past Sunday morning’s yoga class.  I woke up in a weird place.  Dragged my ass outta bed and forced myself to get grocery shopping before class to avoid the rush from people who were just realizing that the Superbowl was in a couple of hours and New England was playing.  I make my way through class, sometimes feeling juicy and strong and sometimes wanting to just give up.  I pushed my wrists harder than I should have.  At the same time I was gentle, taking rests when the Chataranga Dandasanas got to be too much or when my breath came restricted.  Jen was, as always, full of wisdom, encouraging us to modify twists and other poses (I’m guessing in response to the recent NYT yoga scandal), and talking about how we often mistake strain and shallow breathing for working hard when, in fact, our true edge still allows us to breathe deeply.

Then we moved into half pigeon.  Now, if you’ve ever practiced yoga, you’ve likely heard a teacher discuss the hips as emotional warehouses.  We send so much pain and joy and hurt and fear to them.  Physically, we sit all day and wear shoes that are awful for us.  Hip openers tend to be intense, always physically and sometimes emotionally.  I was doing fine until Jen said one word: change. 

Heaving/gasping/weeping…I couldn’t stop.  She went on to discuss navigating change gracefully and linked it in to opening the hips and finding calm in moments of intense sensation (but again: not pain!) and so on.  I don’t really remember because I was caught up in this wave of emotional release…of self forgiveness…of enlightenment.

At my parties I say that g-spot orgasms are a full body, out of body, curtain climbing experience.  This was better.

I cried through the other hip.  I cried through savasana.  I cried through our closing ohm.  I tried to grab a bathroom to sob in but none were free.  Other people clearly felt uncomfortable, not sure what to say.  But I couldn’t stop it.  The tears flowed out of me taking with them months of guilt and hurt and anxiety and I wouldn’t have wanted them to stop even if I could have.  I made a deal with myself that I would ask Jen for a hug.

Sounds so simple, right?  But I’m never sure of the line with my teachers, especially those I’ve only practiced with a handful of times.  I was sure, however, that I needed the comfort of someone else’s touch.  The fact that Jen is an awesome massage therapist mighta influenced that thought. 

So I asked, and I received.  It wasn’t a big deal.  But what came after the hug was.  I looked at Jen and said, “Don’t worry.  This is good.  Its all good.  I need this.”

Because it was and because I did.  I felt cleaner and clearer than in months.  No tightness in my third eye, no worry over returning home to who-knows-what, no question in my mind that I should travel down to see my honey for the big game.  Just calm and peace.

Fast forward one day.  When I walked out of work on Monday, I immediately was stopped in my tracks by the sight of the moon over Lake Quinsig (kind of like the one above).  Inspired by the pure beauty of that sight, I meandered home slowly, taking in every bit of hope the dusk had to offer.  I determined I would stop rushing, stop running, stop whizzing through life.  I missed my “regular” yoga class b/c I was caught up in the many moments of my wakl.  How beautiful is that?

All the while I kept thinking: look how far I’ve come.  I posted a while back about how far I had to go.  And when I posted my 2011 review and 2012 intentions, I didn’t acknowledge a lot of the self work I’ve done.  As a society we are so focused on the material things.  On quantifiable accomplishments.  But mine over the past two years have been quieter than that.  I’ve come to know myself in the deepest ways possible.  I’ve learned to accept myself, faults and all, while recognizing the areas where I could use improvement.  I’ve seen my strength and learned to ask for what I need.  My yoga practice has transformed from something physical into something spiritual.  I’ve found my edge, played with it, and sometimes pushed it all the while learning to find calm in discomfort.  There is still a lot of work for me to do.  There’s a lot of forgiveness I need to give and I still feel the pressure of needing to “figure things out” in a way that fits society’s standards (and therefore many of my standards #workingonit).

I might not have a grad school acceptance letter.  Hell, I might not even have a plan for May when my lease is up.  But I have me and all I’ve learned and an amazing support system and the true belief that I’ll land butter side up, right where I’m supposed to be.

Yoga/beauty/life,

Kait xo