Well I hope everyone’s first day back after the Holidays is going well.
I woke up nauseous and am still in my pjs since it took me close to 4 hours (and a call from Verizon re: a very very large bill that shouldn’t be) to garner enough strength to move from bed. And yes I’m still nauseous. Gross.
Anyway, the other day I told you’ll how I set light to my 2012 intentions. It was gratifying and wonderful and definitely something I’ll be making into a tradition. I was inspired to do this by the wonderful Gabby Bernstein whose vlogs I try to remember to watch.
Around midnight I wrote my intentions down on a random business card and really wanted to set fire to them at the restaurant. Beau talk
the alcohol me out of that idea (but honey there’s a candle right there!!!!). Instead we burned it together once we returned to his brother’s place (over the kitchen sink, with the water running). It was a magical experience and I am so happy that part of the evening is intact (unlike, you know, the 45min+ subway ride).
I’ve struggled to determine whether I should share my intentions since, you know, I burned them and all but following in the steps of Gabby and others, I’ve decided I will. So without further ado, I present…
- Release to the Universe. Recognize that it is out of my control and that I am a vessel through which the Universe acts.
- Love my god pod. Sleep more, move more, meditate more, learn my body more, feed my body what it needs, challenge my brain, learn more, read more, do a cleanse, listen in, follow my IPL, quiet the Gremlin, release fear, have kind inner self talk. Don’t beat myself up when I can’t do all these things all the time.
- Heal myself of my adrenaline junki-ness. Check back tomorrow for more on this.
- Do one thing each and every day to grow my business. It can be big (booking a party, organizing contacts) or small (putting in an order, sending e-mails).
- Slow down. While complaining about how my wrist injury slows me down and leaves me incapable of doing things as quickly and efficiently as before, I had this ah ha! moment whereby I realized that my complaint possessed the very lesson I was supposed to be learning.
- Accept me for, well, me. I’ve always been an outcast, the one doing right simply because it is right or crusading for other to do right. I’ll always be an outcast, passing up on meat and dairy and eggs…believing in CAM therapies and the Universe…etc etc. Its time for me to accept this fact, that others love me at least in part because of this, and that though I may be an outcast to society, I am not alone.
The last intention actually came to me on New Year’s day when beau was telling me about a scene he witnessed in the grocery store. A boy and his mom were shopping and the boy got so super excited about buying…soy milk. Beau’s commentary included the fact that “there’s no hope for him.” I started sobbing and realized I am that boy…we all are to some degree. And at 23 I really need to accept that fact.
I am different. I always have been (you should here my momma talk about how I came into this world) and always will be. Its who I am. And I wouldn’t change that for anything.