Passion Files: Research Opportunities

Hi loves,

I’m currently at the JHSPH Open House (!) learning great things about my future adventure.  In honor of that, I’m leaving you with some fantastic opportunities to partake in some awesome research studies through the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University.  This also makes up for my super long P:FB post yesterday.  🙂

Sexuality Issues During Pregnancy

Who’s Eligible: couples who are 8 to 12 weeks pregnant with their first child and currently living together
Incentive: up to $50 in Amazon gift cards plus store coupons for completing the study!

Couples, Condoms, and Sexual Behaviors

Who’s Eligible: heterosexual, monogamous couples between the ages of 18 and 40
Incentive: gift cards, up to $100

That’s it for now.  Short and sweet for your weekend…plus a way to earn some freebies.   Its win/win for everyone!  I can’t wait to fill you in on my trip to Baltimore soon.


Kait xo

Project: Food Budget, Week 26

Welcome back to P:FB!  First congratulations to Raphael T for winning the Passion giveaway and to Molly Parr for wining the Crock-pot!  I used a random number generator to determine the winners.  I hope you ladies enjoy your products.  🙂

Now, onward and upward.  After a 3-week hiatus I’m ready to talk groceries, budgeting, and couponing!  This week official marks the halfway point for the P:FB bloggers who started back in October.  <– wowza  and congrats to those I’ve learned so much from doing this project, from honing my couponing skills to being flexible with my budget as need be.

The latter lesson was especially relevant over the past few weeks.  So let’s talk about this a little more…aka prepare yourself for a longer post.  Scroll down if you just wanna see how I did!  I promise not to take it personally.  😉

If you remember back on Mar 8, I had gone over hugely ($59!).  I ate a ridiculous amount of greens, gave the rest away (an entire box of that Olivia’s =/), and soothed my aching soul with the fact that I didn’t have to shop for the week I was in Vegas.  <– wrong!

Then I realized that I very well could be eating white rice + overcooked veggies for Convention so off to Trader’s I went (in a full panic…legit one of the girls who works there had to calm me down because I was in full blown panic attack mode =/).  I stocked up on $20 worth of essentials: trail mix, lara bars, wasabi peas, and apples.  Fun fact about peas: they are a protein-rich veggie with 4g per ½c serving!  Those along with my last few oranges, homemade banana bread, and flax almond butter meant I could survive regardless of what the food options were and without spending a ton of extra $ on breakfast!  Budgeting win!

As for eats in Vegas, feast your eyes!  Honestly, the Rio’s catering blew me away.  My Passion sisters shared their extra and/or unwanted veggies with me and I ate like a queen.

Roasted Veggie Stack – I had this 3x

Tofu Dish – I asked the waitress what it was because I was in shock and thought it might be fish!

Coconut Avocado Smoothie…and mostly me.  😉

Dessert one.  I don’t know why its so tiny…

Dessert two.

So that brings us to March 15.  I get back from Vegas and meal plan and grocery plan and discover that I need Olive Oil…and lemon juice (I buy organic)…which leaves me about $25 (good EVOO + organic lemon juice will do that to your budget) for all my produce!  I ended up spending about $50 in all which isn’t too bad considering $15 of it was on those two items.  Of course I proceeded to spend much more while out eating ($60 one night and $15 the next) but that’s from the discretionary fund people!  😀  And I couldn’t say no to my last Worcester Restaurant Week, especially when it involved these beauties.

And that brings us to this week when my lesson on being flexible came in huge hand.   My list included the following:

  • Paper towels.
  • Face moisturizer
  • Dish soap
  • 5 spices: chili powder, granulated garlic powder, granulated onion powder, nutmeg (!), and cayenne pepper
  • Tampons
  • Ibruprofen

That’s basically $40 right there.  Plus I realized that since I would be travelling this upcoming weekend (as in I wrote this post partially on the commuter rail and partially at South Station and partially at Logan airport and partially in my friend’s living room in Baltimore) and it was the end of the month, I needed to go through my month-end coupons and see what was expiring, what I had match-ups for, what I needed to stock my pantry with, etc.


So what did I decide to do?  Give myself a $100 budget for the week.  Sorry I should have made sure you were sitting before I dropped that bomb on you!  I know, it’s a huge increase.  So what gives?  Plain and simple, I didn’t want to feel guilty for missing my budget.  So I set it high and figured that if I hit it, fine.  I was prepared.  If I didn’t, even better.  Of course for those details you’ll have to keep reading!

Meal Plan

*Rather than planning specific meals for specific days, I cook in bulk once or twice a week and eat leftovers for both lunch and dinner.  I also eat gleefully devour a green smoothie every morning for breakfast.

Coconut Lentils with Raw Creamed Spinach

Kale Salad with Sesame Miso Dressing

Mac & Simple Cheese Sauce (EHH)

Bad news: I had other things planned but one night didn’t feel well…hence the mac & cheese…and otherwise just didn’t feel like cooking anything else.

Bad news 2: I didn’t really enjoy the Miso dressing.  The flavor just…wasn’t right for me.  I felt that it was a bit watery and didn’t really break down the kale leaves like Mama Pea’s recipes did.

Good news: The coconut lentils were outstanding…so was the simple cheese sauce.  In fact I was so busy spooning the latter to my mouth that I realize I had spilled it down the front of me.  Haha  But legit…grab yourself a can of coconut milk and make those lentils.  If you are cooking for one, I’d suggest halving the recipe or plan on sharing/freezing/eating it for a week.

Great news: I created my first official recipe this week! I wanted creamed spinach to go along with the coconut lentils but I didn’t want a cooked version since I feel best when I eat raw foods and am slowly but surely starting to believe that on average, they are best for us.  So I got to searching and I looked at a couple of recipes and shazam!  First timer’s luck or secret recipe-creating skills?  You decide!

Raw Indian Spiced Creamed Spinach (raw, vegan, gf)

Inspired by this and this.

4 c raw spinach (preferably organic)
¾-1 c nondairy milk (I used coconut to go with the theme)
1+ clove(s) garlic
1in+ ginger
¼ c chopped onion
2 tsp cumin
1tsp garam masala
½ -1 tsp cayenne pepper
¼ tsp turmeric
½ tsp salt
¼ c almonds (optional; see note)

Toss it all in your food processor and process away.  Adjust the garlic, ginger, and cayenne according to your tastes and proceed with caution.  Their flavors are more pronounced since this is a raw dish.  Also do not plan on kissing anyone for about three days after eating this. 😉

Note: Mine was super thin at first when I used the full cup of milk so I tossed in a big handful of raw almonds to thicken the mixture up. It not only worked wonders but added a bit of texture.  This step is totally up to you.

Spending Savings

Ed Hyder’s: $15.33
Target: $13.20
Trader Joe’s: $10.47
Wegmans: $37.14

Total: $76.14

I spent an additional $22.55 at WF but my wonderful momma came up to visit and was a coupon caper side-kick and covered that cost (plus our delish WF lunch) for me.  Still I would have stayed under my $100 budget.

Eligible Spending (sans WF): $50.34
Savings: $36.17 (72%)

Eligible Spending (with WF): $72.89
Savings: $103.44 (142%)

Yea, let’s go with those latter numbers instead!

Steals & Deals

Ongoing deals are starred.


Honey Bunches of Oats Fruit Blends: $2.75 (sale price)
$1.00 Post coupon

Total Price: $1.75

Simple Facial Moisturizer: $10.44 (sale price)
$1.00 Simple coupon (no longer available)
Total Price: $9.44

Snack Factory Pretzel Thins: $1.99
$1.00 Snack Factory coupon (no longer available)
Total Price: $0.99

2x Up&Up Ibruprofen: $0.97ea = $1.94
$1.00/2 Target coupon (received at register)
Total Price: $1.00 wyb2 = $0.50 ea


 *Cleaned & Cut Kale Greens (16oz): $2.99
$1.00 Wegmans coupon
Total Price: $1.99

*Cleaned & Cut Baby Corn: $2.50
$1.00 Wegmans coupon

Total Price: $1.50

So Delicious Unsweetened Coconut Milk: $3.29
$0.55 So Delicious Coupon

$1.00/$3.00 Nature’s Marketplace Wegmans couponTotal Price; $1.19 = $2.38/gal

Let’s Do Organic Reduced Fat Unsweetened Shredded Coconut: $2.99
$1.00/$3+ Nature’s Marketplace Wegmans coupon
Total Price: $1.99

 *Dagoba Chocolate Bar: $2.49
$0.50 Dagoba cpn, Spring Healthy Livings Magazine
Total Price: $1.49 ßnot the best deal but it was calling to me!

 *OB Tampons (40ct): $5.99 (sale price)
$0.75 OB coupon

$1.00/$5+ HBC Wegmans coupon
Total Price: $3.49 or just 8 cents/tampon!

*Neturogena Blemish Cream: $5.49
$1.50 Neutrogena coupon, SS 01/08/12 #2
$1.00/$5 HBC Wegmans coupon
Total Price = $2.99

*Marcal Small Steps Paper Towles (8ct): $6.99
$1.00 Marcal cpn, RP 03/11/12
$1.00/$5+ Paper Wegmans coupon
Total price: $4.99 = $0.62/roll

*Earth Friendly Dish Soap: $2.99 (sale price)
$2.00 Earth Friendly Recyclebank Coupon

Total Price: $0.99

Whole Foods

*365 Organic Lentils: $2.39
$1.00 Jan/Feb Whole Deal coupon
Total Price: $1.39/lb

Udi’s Original Granola: $5.99
Free Udi’s Product coupon (from Christmas thing on Fbook)
Total Price: FREE!

Nature’s Path Granola Bars: $3.00 (save $1.69)
$1.50/2 Mar/Apr Whole Deal coupon

$2.00 Nature’s Path coupon (from my yoga studio)
Total Price: $0.25 each!

*Method Dish Soap $4.69
$1.00 Mar/Apr Whole Deal coupon
$1.00 Method coupon, SS 01/08/12
Total Price = $2.69

Kiss my Face Moisture Soap (16oz): $8.99 (save $3)
$2.00 Kiss My Face coupon (no longer available)
Total Price $6.99

Update: I was a bit over exhausted when I posted this and forgot to forward you to my LOVELY fellow P:FB-ers .  Go share the y/b/l love with em!



Kait xo

Looking Forward: WC Edition


First of all, thanks for all the great giveaway entries!  Haven’t entered?  Just click below…

Lube Giveaway (closes tonight/Wednesday, March 28 at 12am EST)
Crockpot Giveaway (closes Wednesday, March 28 at 11:59pm EST)

Now for more future talk!  A couple weeks ago I invited you all join me as I look forward to my move to Baltimore.  We talked about crock-pots (interestingly the one I’m giving away!) and non-stick cookware and Kaybird.  This week…its all about water closet/powder room/bathroom.  Yes, I give you full permission to return tomorrow for a (much) less fluffy post.  No, I’m not going to be talking about potty time…well, not too much!  😉

I do quickly want to address one thing: my roommate.  I lucked out when it came to finding someone random who is clean (relatively, of course, in the same way that I’m clean), laid back, etc.  These lists are in no way a reflection on him but rather me looking forward to not having to share a space.  Totally different issues and I know you all get it.

I’m incredibly lucky now because I have a massive bathroom.  I doubt I’ll have that in the city but there are other perks of having a bathroom to call your own that will more than make up for the lack of size.  Presented in no particular order, here’s what I’m looking forward to in having my own bathroom!  Yes…these are things I think about.  Don’t you know this about me by now?  Teheh

  • The toilet seat and cover will stay down, therefore saving my toothbrush and other toiletries from “those” germs that get ejected into the air every. single. time. you flush!  I’ve taught beau to do this because it totally skeeves me out!
  • Leaving the door open after a shower.  And hopefully saving my stainless steel accessories from additional rusting.  At the end of the day, I’m really hoping for a fan.  *fingers crossed*  Oh and we close the door to help save $ on our energy bill since we keep the hallway/kitchen/living room more temp regulated for Ms. Kaybird.
  • No more boy hair.  This is nothing against my roommate who is very clean and not very hairy.  But every now and then some of that facial hair escapes and uuugh.  And yes I’m running a double standard hair. But my hair is ok to touch because, well, its mine.  And to be honest, even my hair creeps me out a litte!  haha
  • Taking a bath.  Yes, we have a bathtub now.  Yet no matter how hard I scrub, it still looks dirty.  No way am I sinking my awesome God Pod into that, despite how much my bath bombs and salts and essential oils are calling my name!
  • Air drying.  ‘Nuff said.
  • If its yellow…. If you don’t know the rest of that rhyme then we can’t be friends.   Kidding…kind of.   But for reals…saving water is good for the earth and your karma/chi/abundance.
  • Peeing with the door open.  You know I had to throw some potty time talk in here, right?!

Speaking of potty time, check out these totally awesome toilets!  <–yes, this is happening





And just so the gents don’t feel left out, how’d you like to do your biz in one of these urinals?  Bahaha

Source for all

Best caption wins all my love and adoration + my admiration for being creative, so leave some loving below! 

Totally fluffy post?  Yes.  I hope it made you smile or laugh…with me or at me (or at least at those friggin urinals). If you want more, click here.

Until next time…


Kait xo

PS For reals…go enter to win yourself some free stuff!  Free =  good!  😀

Just Another Manic Monday…with a Giveaway! (CLOSED)


Happy Monday Loves!  I hope you enjoyed our little adventure down Passion Blvd last week!  I had a blast writing about Passion and can’t wait to explore the topics you’ve inquired about some more.  Don’t forget…the Passion giveaway is open until this Wednesday, March 28 at 12am EST!  I think somefree lubecan help make even the most manic of Mondays a little better, don’t you?  😉

Speaking of things that make Mondays better, how about tools to help simplify your life?  A couple weeks ago <–seriously, has it been that long?! I wrote about a number of experiences I’m looking forward to having in my Baltimore kitchen.  One of them was using a crock pot.  Momma came up for a visit yesterday and in addition to being my coupon caper sidekick, she took some things home to clean + prep for the new apartment.  Things like this bad boy:


Oh Crock-Pot…the wonderful things people say about you.  A time-saver, a working mom/dad/gal/guy’s best friend, an overnight miracle worker. With you by my side I can dishes like Mama Pea’s Spicy African Peanut Stew and Janetha’s Slow Cooked Steel Cut Oatmeal plus use Ashley’s method for doing dried beans.  I can set you and run to class or yoga or my bed and come back to have a meal all ready.  *sigh*

What’s that?  You’re jealous and want one too?  Well, you happen to be in luck!   This week you have the chance to win a highly reviewed 3qt Crock-Pot courtesy of!  SlimKicker helps you stay motivated to stick with your fitness + diet goals. They also offer tools such as a calorie counter and fitness tracker. In other words, its a fantastic tool making your Monday, and every other day, a little less hectic while helping you to stick to your weight loss and/or healthy living goals… just like a Crock-Pot.

I’d say that’s a good thing!

To enter, simply leave a comment below answering this question: What’s one thing you do that keeps you motivated to stay fit?  The contest ends Wednesday, March 28 at 11:59 EDT and is open to US residents only (sorry my fantastic international readers. 😦 ).

Now back to my mania…


Kait xo

Week of Passion – Final Thoughts

First of all, I just want to say a big giant happy HELLO to all the meals&moves bloggers who are popping over here after reading my guest post.

Secondly, our week of Passion, like all good things, is coming to an end.  😦  We’ve talked Chippendales, Tushies, Orgasms, Passion Pantry Staples, and more!  I’ve had so much fun doing this week and I definitely play on including more posts about Passion here on the blog.  After all, it is part of what brings beauty into my life.  <–yea you see what I did there?!  😉

Before we end, I wanted to share some final, personal thoughts about Passion.  On Wednesday evening I did the first of a series of 12 coaching calls with the ahmazing Hillary Rubin and a few of things came to clarity for me with regards to my Passion.

The thing is, to me Passion isn’t just about sex.  Yes sex is a huge part of it for many people and certainly when we consider its popular use.  But to those of us committed to its cause, Passion is about so so much more.

Its why this was a week of Passion and not a week of sex.  Its why I chose the term “Sensuality” rather than “Sexuality” to describe the type of education and coaching I do in my business.  Its why I’m pursuing an MPH in women’s and reproductive healthy and a PhD in sex therapy.

Passion is about coming into your body and fully experiencing the moment, the joy, and the bliss of using it in whatever way you consciously desire.  You can do this through sex; unfortunately, I’ve learned too many women do not.  <–why I know my skills are needed  You can also do this through dance, yoga, running, singing, painting…really any physical experience where you can 100% just let go and feel the pleasure of life and the moment you’re in course through each and every cell (thank you nitric oxide).

Passion, and its relative sensuality, look different for everyone.  But what they have in common is the resulting feeling of bliss.  One of the activities Hillary and I completed on last night’s call was to determine how I wanted to feel each day and what steps I could take to do so.  I don’t remember which feeling we were going over but at one point I started rhapsodizing about finding your way into “that” yoga pose (yogis and yoginis you totally know what I mean here).  I said something along the lines of the following:

“When you find your way into that pose…that one maybe you’ve been struggling to connect to or just don’t like.  And you are just totally out of your head and into your body and its just pure bliss and joy and there’s no just better feeling because you’re fully connected and engaged and in the moment…except an orgasm.  Yea add that to the list.  It’s just, mmm, the BEST feeling in the world.

That, ladies and gents, is Passion.  And this is mine.  Empowering others through sensuality education & coaching brings endless joy into my life.  Its my way of healing others.  I might not be a doctor (now or ever…we’ll see!) but the changes I can help others invite into their relationships, well those can be just as lifesaving.  Because our physical bodies aren’t just a collection of numbers (weight, height, blood pressure, cholesterol, iron level, etc, etc, etc) but rather highly complex, energetic beings that require so much more than food + water + shelter (sorry Maslow) to live in our optimum state.  We need laughter and love and Passion and something to fight for<–And at the end of the day, aren’t those really all the same things?

You might have absolutely loved the departure from the norm I took this week.  Or it might not have been your cup of tea at all.  Regardless, I hope you felt my pure enthusiasm and joy and, yes, Passion, stream through each and every word.  And if you take nothing else away from this week…if this is the first and last post you ever read here…take this: find your Passion, commit to it, practice it often, and shout it shamelessly from the rooftops.

Its yours to own and no one else’s.  You think my smile would be this big otherwise?


Kait xo

Week of Passion – Giveaway + Guest Post

Today is a super exciting day.  Well…since you asked…my Week of Passion is taking over the interwebs!  Not only am I hosting my first ever giveaway both here and on Facebook but also because the lovely Janetha is featuring my sexy tips as the first post in her new Three Tips Thursday series.  Make sure to head on over to Meals & Moves for more of that sweet goodness.  East-coasters – Janetha is in Utah so her posts tend to come later in our day.  Check back tonight/tomorrow if you can’t find it.

Welcome to the first ever Y/B/L giveaway!  Technically this is a giveaway on my Facebook page but I figured since we’re celebrating Passion here, I’d share the love!

This giveaway is for a Passion Pantry must-have.  It makes play-time (solo or with a partner) both safer and way more fun!  By decreasing friction and heightening sensation, this product lets you feel into your body like never before.  Because it is water-based, it is condom-friendly, non-staining, and easily reactivated.  <–think a little lick…or using a bit of water if you prefer  Because it was created by Passion Parties, its also long-lasting, non-sticky, and sure to bring you pleasure.

Passion Parties RomantaTherapy Revelation Lubricant (sorry for the crappy picture)

Rules of the Giveaway

  1. To enter, simply leave a comment on my Facebook page or here regarding one topic you’d like me to explore in more depth here.  It can be anything, but I’d especially love suggestions about women’s and/or sexual health/issues/etc.
  2. You must “Like” Passion by Kait to be eligible.
  3. Winner will be chosen using a random numbers generator after collapsing all comments into one thread.  #nerd

The giveaway closes next Wednesday, March 28 at 12am EST.  Just to be different from all those giveaways that end at 11:59 pm. 😉


Kait xo

P.S. Project: Food Budget will be back next week!

Week of Passion – Notes on Wellness

Thanks for all your kind comments on yesterday’s posts.  I was a little hesitant about how you all would feel about my Week of Passion posts since it is a pretty big departure from the norm here at y/b/l so I truly appreciate the encouragement!

In my Convention re-cap post I mentioned how I had the opportunity to train with some amazing individuals.  Since Wednesdays are typically days for revelations, I wanted to share some of the amazing things I learned from these speakers.  I’m going to do a quick intro of each before highlighting my favorite quotes from their presentations.  The common theme: passion.

Dr. Sadie Allison


Dr. Sadie Allison is the author of several sex how-to books including Tickle Your Fancy, Tickle His Pickle, and her latest book, Tickle My Tush which I reviewed yesterday.  She is the founder and CEO of Tickle Kitty Inc which both published her books and her line of lubricants.  She is “America’s Pleasure Coach” and the mission of her work is to help people have more powerful orgasms (Source).  One of the many reasons I love her is her belief that knowledge = power and that our brain is, indeed, our biggest and most powerful sex organ!  Seeing her speak left me beyond starstruck because she is as intelligent, engaging, and sexy as the photo above and her writing implies.

Here are my favorite bits of information that Dr. Allison shared with us during her presentation.  These are not direct quotes because I paraphrased extensively in my notes.  That being said, absolutely all material belongs to Dr. Allison.

  • Every clitoris is different.  <–aka, don’t assume that what worked on the last girl will work on the next!
  • Because the clitoris and penis come from the same tissue, you need to start thinking of one like the other, especially when it comes to touching/licking/caressing each.
  • It is ok to have a conversation with your partnerbefore you get busy to let your partner know, “Hey, I need 20 minutes to warm up…let’s do this and let’s do that.  Not only will it let me relax, everything will feel better for you too!”
  • “Explore new things because that is what keeps Passion alive”…if you don’t like it, it’s ok!  Just be open to trying new things and experimenting to find what you like.
  • The factors which affect male pleasure include the following: lubrication, grip, speed, stroke, angle, warmth, rhythm, and variety.  *whew*
  • “Hands are some of the best toys we have.” <–amen to that!

Continue reading

Week of Passion – Tickle My Tush Book Review

This post contains explicit information intended only for those 18+.

Speaking of which, this post might make you feel a little uncomfortable.  IMO, all new learning experiences should be. For those of you running towards the ‘x’ as quickly as possible I ask that you give this post a shot and, yourself, a chance to discover something new.   At the end you might still say, “Naw…not for me.”  That is perfectly ok. You might also say, “Hey…I was told wrong.  I need to explore this more.”  Regardless, please keep all comments clean and respectful, recognizing that some readers may find this awkward and even painful…or this might be someone’s favorite topic.  As I say at parties, “We never want to yuck on someone else’s yum.”

Ok so since I slacked yesterday, you are getting two posts from me today!  I need to make up for my long absence, right?!

This afternoon I want to introduce you to one of my idols: Dr. Sadie Allison.  I mentioned her briefly earlier but want to go more in-depth before reviewing her latest how-to sex book, Tickle my Tush: Mild-to-Wild Analplay Adventures for Everybooty.

You can tell why I like her already, right?  We both adore cheesy puns.  *sigh*

Anyway Dr. Allison is the author of several how-to sex books including Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-on Guide to Penis Pleasuring and Ride ‘Em Cowgirl: Sex Position Secrets for Better Bucking.  One of my favorite aspects of Dr. Allison’s approach to writing about sex is her lightheartedness with sometimes heavy topics (see my point re: cheesy puns above).  She is serious when necessary, such as when discussing sexual safety, but is comfortable enough with the unfortunately-still-taboo topic to laugh at it (and herself).  The information contained in each book is presented in such a way that will make you giggle, sometimes with joy and sometimes uncomfortably.

You have to leave your comfort zone to start living, right?

All her books include cartoon-ish illustrations, a chapter on safe sex (woot!), FAQs, and a guide to any terms that may be unknown or made up (e.g. a-spot for anus).  I’m a huge fan of the two books mentioned above and will likely review them in the future.  For now lets just say that Tickle is the penis bible and Ride ‘Em is the greatest position book ever simply by excluding positions that require you to be double-jointed.

But lets get to the butt of this post…I mean heart.  I swear.  😉

Fun fact: thoes are the great dr’s lips you see.  In fact, her face is on the cover of every book.  Some may find that conceited but hey…she’s an independent publisher with 2million+ books sold so I say she can do what she wants!

Alright…onto the book.  For reals this time!

Dr. Allison does an amazing job of de-stigmatizing the booty.  While most people immediately think of anal sex when they hear the former word, she shows that there are a ton of fun activities you can enjoy sans penetration.  In fact, it takes eight whole chapters to even get to the topic of penetration!  Even then she continues to follow the book’s mild-to-wild theme by showing you the five levels of penetration starting with just one knuckle.  From there we move onto G-spot and prostate massage (huuuge orgasm triggers for her and him, respectively), toys, and positions.  Throughout these chapters, Dr. Allison reminds us that communication is key as is taking it slow and letting the individual being penetrated call all the shots.  Anal play isn’t generally something you jump right into as the tissue back there is not as elastic as that of the vagina and therefore needs a bit more conscious training!

So what’s contained in those first 7 chapters?  Information about sexual safety, hygiene, anatomy, massage, non-penetrative finger play, and oral play.  In that mild-to-wild order.  And throughout these Dr. Allison reminds the reader that you need not go one page further.  She encourages you to, if only to learn, but does not pressure, another feature I greatly appreciate.

Do I think this book is the penultimate guide to anal play?  No.  In fact I expect it is a pretty basic introduction for some.  However, for those who have never experimented, for sex educators without much personal experience and/or knowledge about this aspect of sexuality, for those couples for which anal play is the primary source of sex…this is a fantastic introduction and absolute must-have addition to your library.

Here’s a short guide to the things I loved…and those I didn’t!

Things I Loved

  • The book’s layout (mild-to-wild overall and within each chapter).
  • De-stigmatizing anal adventures.
  • The plentiful photos.
  • The basic info on safety, hygiene, etc. and the fact that it is repeated throughout the book.
  • The no-pressure tone of the writing and encouragement to explore at your own pace and within your comfort zone (kind of).
  • The emphasis on communication and trust between partners.

Things I Wasn’t Crazy About

I didn’t love the fact that much of her writing ties so closely into societal norms about what relationships and sex should look like.

  • The book is written for hetero couples (although she does note that you can interchange any pronouns) with all the pictures featuring a female and male and the conversation about him and her.
  • The vilification of hair down.  Undoubtedly, for some, hair may be a non-issue or even a total turn-on.  I’ve heard or read it all folks…this is my passion and my career!  This information could have been presented in a more neutral, “If you wanna groom here’s how and if not that’s cool too!”
  • Her definition of gender as being based on one’s genitals.  Boo hiss.

Thing I’m on the Fence About

Throughout the book, Dr. Allison uses here own terms (defined early in the book) for anatomical parts.  “A-spot” instead of “anus,” “pleasure tunnel” instead of “rectum,” etc.  I can see how this would be a good thing for those who aren’t comfortable using anatomically-correct terms.  However, part of my goal with my work is to overcome genital shame and a part of that is being able to speak the proper names of our body parts without shame or concern.

Say it with me now…VULVA!

Ok…had to get that out!

All in all…if you have ever wondered about or wanted to know more about analplay, I highly recommend this book.  As my way of saying thank you for your support over the past five months, I’m offering all Y/B/L readers 20% off any of Dr. Allison’s award-winning titles.  All payments will be processed through PayPal for your security and books range from $15-17 through PP.

Click here to see all of Dr. Allison’s titles.
Click here to contact me with your order.

I hope you enjoyed this post and would happily chat with you more about the topic of analplay or any sex-related topic me.  Use the Contact Form at the top of the page to send in questions, etc.  I’m thinking there’s an FAQ post in our future! If you have a super personal question/concern, we can set up a 15-minute one-on-one consultation.

Oh and don’t forget to be a dear and show your support for this post (and me in general) by “Liking” me. 


Kait xo

Week of Passion – Behind-the-Scenes at Convention 2012

Welcome to the first ever Week of Passion!

Each day I’m going to cover a different topic related to Passion Parties, our Convention, or Passion in general.  I’ve only written about my biz a handful of times so I’m excited to explore this topic in more depth with all of you.

Today I’m going to give you a behind-the-scenes look into convention!  I’m secretly hoping some of you maybe so impressed that you say, “Hey girlfriend…I want that lifestyle!  Sign me up!”  Ok…secret’s out!

This year’s Convention theme was “Get the Party Started”  and party we did!  Having just finished my cleanse, I didn’t do too much drinking because I knew a) my alcohol tolerance would be nonexistent, b) my sugar tolerance is dooown, and c) I wanted to fit into my clothes come Wednesday.  <–I learned that last one the hard way last year.  😦  Even more, I wanted to prove to myself that I could mostly stick to my healthy habits while on the go and in situations where I wasn’t in control of the food choices.

Sunday was our annual team costume party and I happily enjoyed my Avocado Slush (see below).  One of our leaders’ hubbies went as Snow White (yes you read that correctly) and we were all his dwarves.  I was more wood nymph but hey…my legs look good.

Chaos 1

Chaos 2

Eventually we all made our way up to the hotel’s rooftop club (talking our way in since we definitely weren’t in dress code) where we proceed to tear up the dance floor, PP style!

Monday was our first of two awards dinner where Corporate honors new leaders in the company plus others who’ve reached milestones with their sales and/or sponsoring.  AKA we get fed a catered meal and spoiled with goodies like diamonds and iPads.  Oh and these hunks come for a visit!


Not sure who I'm sassing here...

Tuesday was our annual team trip to Freemont St.  This is in old Vegas and has the largest screen in the world.  There’s also a zipline, lots of casinos, a McDonald’s, Krispy Kreme, and, oh wait, places to get ginormous drinks.  Highlights from this year included getting kicked out of McDonald’s for having alcohol, performing ridiculous dares (see below), and, of course, dancing on the bar at Hogs & Heifers.  Did I mention that we have party buses as transportation?  Oh yea…forgot about that!  😉

Waiting for the buses!

My dare? Teach 3 people a dance!

Cotton Eyed Joe it is then!

Thanking them...or just showing off my bum? 😉

Tehe  And, of course, Wednesday was our big awards dinner: Night of the Stars.  We celebrated the best of the best on Wednesday…and more ridiculousness ensued, of course.

Wednesday night post-dinner we all just hung in our pjs and ate junk food and did team bonding.  I might have consumed too much Jack Daniels…but just maybe.  😉  I think I slept for a total of 20 hours the entire time…when you only see your team once per year, you make the most of every loving + blissful second together.

During the days, when I wasn’t walking to Chinatown for those slushes + veg food, we trained with leaders in the field such as Dr. Sadie Allison (look for my review of her latest book this week!) and Dr. John Gray (author of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus) as well as the fabulous Alison Levine.  All three were incredibly dynamic, engaging, and informative.  Don’t let Dr. Gray’s geeky appearance put you off –  we all had crushes on him by the end of the speech!  Both Sadie and Alison are hot little tickets who are kicking ass and taking names while showing that you can be powerful and sexy.  Yes I just wrote that.  Haha

And of course there was the Breakthrough Experience with Brian Biro.  This is the last formal activity we share as a company and it is, by far, the most powerful.  I sobbed last year when it was my turn to break my (1-in, solid wood) board and again this year as I realized just how much of Brian’s lessons and my experience had manifested unknowingly in my life over the past year.  Its incredibly empowering, inspiring, and life-changing.  You literally see people transform before your eyes. 

To this day my board sits on my dresser with my zipline wristband pinned through it (fear of flying breakthrough).  Clearly these are my photos from last year…the experience is far too intimate to share for others.  Lots of tears and absolutely unforgettable.  If you ever have the chance to train with Brian, do not pass it up for anything.  Oh and I am taking full bragging rights and letting you know I broke that SOB on my first try.  I won’t, however, tell you what overwhelming fear I broke through.  Lets just say less than 1 year later, Hopkins came in and proved that my journey is complete, for now.

I hope you enjoyed this little peek into the biggest party of the year!  Since I missed Monday, I’ll be putting up my book review a little later today so stay tuned!


Kait xo


Hello loves,

I’ve missed you so!  I had a week’s worth of blogs all planned, wrote them en route to VEGAS and then heard those words us travelling folks hate: no complimentary internet.

Obviously getting veg-filled food trumped going to Starbucks for free internet so this guy was lonely for the week…except according to my stats you all were pretty busy catching up on old posts.

Distance makes the heart grow fonder, eh?!

Yea I was around Canadians for a bit this week.  Don’t worry…all the juicy, passionate, details are on their way for my upcomingWeek of Passion.


Kait xo